


Goodbye

by ALTsvtsector123



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: 1996-line friendship, I don't even know what I'm writing anymore, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-06
Updated: 2019-11-06
Packaged: 2021-01-24 05:53:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21333304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ALTsvtsector123/pseuds/ALTsvtsector123
Summary: He was unbelievably stupid.For thinking that he’d actually love him.For believing in his own lies that the person he loves loved him back.For staying with someone who had never and never will love him back.
Relationships: Kim Mingyu/Lee Jihoon | Woozi, Side Jeon Wonwoo/Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi, side Wen Jun Hui | Jun/Xu Ming Hao | The8
Comments: 4
Kudos: 40





	Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> My second Jigyu fanfiction \\(^u^)/

He was unbelievably stupid. 

For thinking that he’d actually love him. 

For believing in his own lies that the person he loves loved him back.

For staying with someone who had never and never will love him back.

~

Jihoon walked to his home, no,  _ their  _ home, the snow below his shoes crunching as he made his way. A while later, he reached an apartment. It wasn’t so big. Not small either. Just a dainty home, enough for two. 

He had to end it. He already felt bad that the younger had to put up with being with him for the past three years. The least he could do now was to set the younger free.

_ But he’s already free. He was never yours. _ A voice in the back of his mind told him. He ignored it.

As Jihoon opened the door, his heart broke.

He had  _ known _ . He  _ knew _ Mingyu was always out late at parties, flirting with the girls despite having Jihoon as his boyfriend. He  _ knew  _ Mingyu was a total ladies’ man. He  _ knew  _ Mingyu never loved him and had only accepted to be with him because he had pitied the older. 

Mingyu was just that much of a good person.

He thought he had already braced himself for the harsh reality. But… Entering the cold house they once called home, hearing soft high-pitched moans coming from  _ their  _ room, Jihoon felt broken. So devoid of life and love. So betrayed. 

Even though he  _ knew _ .

Jihoon blinked back the tears that were threatening to fall. There was nothing he could do now. Crying definitely wouldn’t help the current situation. He quietly slipped off the ring on his finger and put it on the dining table. The ring that Mingyu had given him on their first anniversary as a promise to be together forever.

_ Lies _ .  _ All lies _ .

Yet, he had held on to those lies for three years.  _ Three whole years _ .

Did those years mean nothing to the younger? Jihoon wondered silently as he made his way back to the door. He didn’t even bother getting his things. There was nothing to take anyways. Why did he even come here?

He put on his shoes and soon, he was out again in the freezing cold, the snowflakes his only companion.

Then, pulling his thick jacket around him, Jihoon made his way away from the place where his lover was making love with another.

~

The first time they met, Jihoon knew that he had fallen. Why and how? He didn’t know. What he did know was that his heart raced uncontrollably whenever the tall-as-a-giraffe younger was around him.

They were the best of friends despite their one year age difference, and they were always joined to the hip. However, Mingyu had never noticed Jihoon’s more-than-friends feelings for him. After all, Jihoon wouldn’t tell him. He was  _ never  _ planning to tell the younger about his feelings. He was a coward, he didn’t want to lose his friend just because of the tainted feelings he held for the other. It was  _ wrong _ . For a man to love another man.

But of course, fate had to mess with him.

He was forced to say his feelings when the younger confronted him.

“Hyung, you’re acting weird nowadays… And it feels like you’re so distant now…” Mingyu had said, a worried expression on his face. He looked like a kicked puppy. “Do you hate me?” Mingyu had whispered so quietly, in contrast to his usual loudness.

“What the —? That’s what you were thinking?” Jihoon had replied. Then, before he could regret it, he said it. “It’s the opposite. I freaking love you, Kim Mingyu.”

So, the week had continued with Jihoon doing everything he could to avoid Mingyu. He wasn’t ready to be rejected yet and he ignored the pain in his heart as he felt Minyu’s sad eyes follow him.

He most definitely wasn’t ready for Mingyu to come up to him one day and agree to be his boyfriend.

“Hyung, I… I love you too, Jihoonie hyung,” Mingyu had said. Then, before Jihoon could say anything else, his words were cut off by the feeling of Mingyu’s lips on his.

_ If only Jihoon had noticed the slight hesitance and lies those words contained. _

~

“Bye bye, noona,” Mingyu said as he waved goodbye to the girl he had brought back from the party at Minghao’s. As he closed the door, he made his way to the couch in the living room and sighed as he slumped onto it.

He felt guilty for betraying Jihoon like this — hooking up with girls and bringing them back to their house when he knew the older was gone for work. But… He just couldn’t help it.

He just loved the intoxicating feeling of having a woman’s soft body pressed up against him. The feeling of their soft lips as they kissed his neck and lips. Their fragrance. He loved that about girls.

And despite how small and cute Jihoon was, he  _ wasn’t _ a girl.

He honestly didn’t know what made him accept Jihoon’s confession in the first place.

Maybe he had just wanted Jihoon to stop avoiding him like a plague. Or maybe he just pitied the older. Or perhaps he  _ loved  _ Jihoon?

That thought was immediately wiped out from his mind.

After all, he was a total ladies’ man; he’d flirt with every female in their school and obtain their hearts so easily, as well as break them easily (though gently, of course). H*ll, everyone knew that. Even Jihoon.

But Jihoon still loved him despite knowing that fact. So maybe Mingyu just wanted to try it out. And besides, he was close to the older and found him very endearing. 

However, he didn’t expect to stay with the older for so long. And before he knew it, he was longing for intimate touches from girls once again — things that Jihoon never gave him.

Yes, it was his fault for betraying Jihoon like this but he really couldn’t help it. He never should have settled down so early. But it was too late to end it. And something just didn’t feel right with him whenever he thought about breaking up with Jihoon — he was scared that the older would hate him forever, and despite everything he was doing wrong, Mingyu really didn’t want that to happen.

_ Jihoon hyung _ , Mingyu thought. He looked at the clock. It was already 5 p.m. — the time when Jihoon would always reach home. Where was his hyung?

_ Maybe he’s working overtime?  _ Mingyu was acutely aware of the fact that Jihoon was a perfectionist; no matter the task, he would always get his job done the best he could. That was one of the many things Mingyu adored most about the older. His hyung’s small body held so much passion for what he loved, it amazed him.

_ How did someone like Jihoon hyung fall for someone like me?  _ Mingyu wondered as he felt his eyelids droop.

Soon, the giant puppy was on the couch, dozing off into dreamland, waiting for his hyung to come back.

But Jihoon was gone.

~

Jihoon took a deep breath and rang the doorbell.

The door opened, revealing a confused Wonwoo. Jihoon wasn’t surprised to see the latter in Soonyoung’s house at 3 a.m. in the morning, though he was surprised Wonwoo was still awake at this time.

Wonwoo stared blankly at Jihoon, unable to think of any reason why the shorter was here.

“Who is it, Wonwoo?” Soonyoung’s voice hollered out, snapping Wonwoo out of his stupor. “Ah, it’s Jihoon,” Wonwoo yelled back, and soon enough, a hamster-looking man rushed to the door, engulfing his long-time friend in a bear hug.

“Awww, it’s our precious Jihoonie! What’re you doing… Here?” Soonyoung’s voice got softer as he looked at his friend’s red, puffy eyes. “Jihoonie, what happened?” he asked worriedly.

However, before Jihoon could get any words out of his mouth, Wonwoo gently intercepted the conversation. “Let’s continue this talk inside. It’s d*mn cold out here.”

So in they went into Soonyoung’s dainty home.

~

“Here you go, Jihoon,” Wonwoo said softly as he handed Jihoon a mug of hot chocolate. Jihoon accepted it gratefully. Soonyoung was sitting beside him, spouting out questions he couldn’t hear. 

Fortunately, Wonwoo, being the calm and rational one, bonked Soonyoung on his head. “Hush. Don’t be so overwhelming, Soon. Listen to what he has to say. He’ll say it when he’s ready,” he told Soonyoung, who only nodded and stared at Jihoon with sad eyes.

Jihoon took a deep breath, bracing himself for the wave of emotions and heartbreak as he told the other couple about his dying, broken relationship with Mingyu.

“So… It’s over now,” he ended, taking one last gulp from his mug. He looked at Soonyoung, wondering why his loud friend was suddenly so quiet. After all, he’d expect the other to burst out almost immediately after he fini—. “That jerk!” That broke Jihoon’s train of thought.

At least Soonyoung was still the Soonyoung he knew.

“How could he do this to you?!” Soonyoung shouted, his face red in fury. “It wasn’t his fault, Soon. Don’t blame him.” “You’re still defending him? After all he has done to you?” 

Jihoon only grimaced. “It wasn’t his fault,” he repeated. “I was the one who forced him to become my boyfriend. I forced my feelings upon him.” “Now that’s just bullsh*t.” “Language, Soon,” Wonwoo said quietly.

Looking at Soonyoung, Jihoon smiled sadly.

“I don’t regret loving him, Soonyoung. I never did, and I never will.”

**~**

Soonyoung looked at his small friend sitting on the couch in front of him. Jihoon looked so broken. He  _ hated  _ seeing his friend like this. And he  _ despised  _ the one to make Jihoon like this.  _ Kim Mingyu _ .

How dare he hurt his friend? Jihoon gave that jerk all his love, yet he threw it all away. Why? Why did Jihoon fall for someone like him?

He clenched his fists. Then, he felt a hand on top of his. He looked up. Wonwoo. He felt himself relax slightly. His boyfriend always had a calming effect on him. He pondered over what to do. What could he do to help Jihoon?

And a bright idea came to his mind.

Jihoon started at his friends curiously. The two were exchanging suspicious glances. And the mischievous but creepy grin on Soonyoung’s face made him wonder what impending doom was about to fall upon him.

“What is it?” he asked warily, unable to stand the silent conversation the couple was having.

Soonyoung stared at him. Then, when he spoke next, his voice was uncharacteristically soft. “Well, I… Jihoonie, I’m going to go to Europe soon.” 

The news hit Jihoon’s brain like an unexpected missile. “Wait, you’re leaving?” 

Soonyoung nodded in confirmation, and continued. “As I said, I’ll be going to Europe. I’m going to be opening a choreography school there for a few months and see how things go over there.” He paused for a while. “So… It just popped out of my head suddenly but… Would you want to go with me? Originally, Wonwoo was supposed to come too but you seem like you’ll need it more. And it’s perfect for your job too. You can expand your horizons, and maybe we can even open the school together! Oh my gosh! You and me, as a choreographer and a producer respectively? We’ll be an invisible duo!”

Jihoon started blankly at his friend, speechless. What the h*ll.

“Wait a minute, Soon, you’re getting too far ahead. Look, Jihoon’s gone all haywire,” Wonwoo said, though he was barely suppressing a laugh. 

Jihoon raised his hand as he clutched his head using the other. “Okay wait. So you’re telling me that you want me to follow you to Europe for my job and probably to get away from Mi— Mingyu I presume?”  _ It still hurts to say his name _ … 

Soonyoung nodded immediately, his eyes sparkling with hope and excitement.

Jihoon frowned. It was a good offer not to be missed but… “What about Wonwoo? He was supposed to go with you, wasn’t he? And now you’re leaving him here, just so that I can go with you?” he asked worriedly. “Yup!” Soonyoung answered, way too cheerfully. Jihoon locked eyes with Wonwoo. “You’re okay with this?” he asked, exasperated. Wonwoo merely gave him a shrug.

“Hey, Jihoonie! There’s nothing wrong with this,” Soonyoung said loudly. He then proceeded to cuddle with Wonwoo. “Our love is eternal. Distance won’t do anything to keep us apart… Right, Wonwoo-ya?” Wonwoo nodded, a small smile forming on his face as he pecked Soonyoung on his lips.

Jihoon turned away, his face turning red from the act. Great, he had to watch his friends make more goggly eyes at each other.

He sighed. “I… I really appreciate it, but it feels like you’re doing so much for me…” Jihoon said, looking at the floor. Soonyoung smiled gently as Jihoon raised his head. “Jihoonie, that’s what friends are for… We’re here for you. You can lay your burden on us. We’ll help you.”

Wonwoo nodded, as well, breaking out from his cold facade and smiling warmly. “It’ll be okay, Jihoon.”

“So, wanna follow me to Europe?” Soonyoung asked cheekily as he hugged his friend.

Jihoon nodded, earning a loud ‘Yay!’ from Soonyoung and a clap (yes, only one clap) from Wonwoo.

A smile bloomed on Jihoon’s face. He truly was lucky to have them.

~

Mingyu yawned as he stretched awake. He blinked groggily at the clock on the wall. And jumped up to his feet at once, looking around for any sign of his tiny hyung.

It was already 3:30 a.m.! But where was Jihoon?

“Hyung? Jihoonie hyung?” he yelled. Did his hyung get back home when he was in dreamland? Mingyu frowned. That couldn’t be it. His hyung would have woken him up and told him to go sleep in their bed, if that were the case.

So, where was his hyung?

Looking around the house and checking all the rooms, Mingyu felt his palms become clammy — a sign that he was nervous. The house felt so silent and dark with only him inside, and Jihoon wasn’t anywhere to be found.  _ Hyung _ , he thought.  _ Where are you? _

The moment his eyes landed on the dining table, his blood turned cold. There it laid in all its glory, looking as new as when he had bought it. 

The ring he gave Jihoon.

~

_ No _ .  _ No _ .  _ No, this can’t be happening _ , Mingyu thought as he clutched the small ring in his hand. His hyung wouldn’t leave him. Jihoon wouldn’t do that.  _ Never _ .

But the cold ring in his hand proved otherwise.

So he did the only thing he thought he could do.

“Minghao, help,” Mingyu started as his Chinese friend picked his phone up. “Jihoon hyung’s gone.”

~

“What do you mean he’s gone?” Minghao’s worried voice filled his ears. “That… He isn’t here. He left his ring too.” There was a pause, and some muffled conversation in Chinese at the background. “You… Kim Mingyu, what the h*ll did you do?” Minghao’s tone seemed like the calm before the storm. Mingyu didn’t know what to say. He heard Minghao’s frustrated sigh at the other end of the call. “Wait for me. It’s better if I talk with you face to face.”

Before Mingyu could reply back, Minghao had already hung up.

Soon enough, not even ten minutes later, Minghao arrived with Jun in tow.

“Minghao, I —”

“What the fudging h*ll did you do to him, Mingyu?”

Mingyu was surprised at Minghao’s angry tone, scared even. “That’s what I want to —”

“You played around with another girl  _ again _ , didn’t you? Sh*t, I thought I told you  _ not _ to hook up with someone. That was the  _ only _ d*mn condition I had when I invited you to my party!” Jun stayed beside Minghao, placing a comforting hand on his boyfriend’s shoulder. “Language…” Minghao only glared harder at Mingyu.

Mingyu was as still as stone. He didn’t know what to say. Yes, he did hook up with someone even though he told Minghao he wouldn’t, but…

“I couldn’t help it,” he said, eyes as hard as stone. The reason why he called Minghao was because he thought that his wise friend would be able to find Jihoon, to find out what happened to his hyung. Getting shouted at wasn’t helping.

Unfortunately, Mingyu chose the wrong response.

Minghao laughed hysterically. “You couldn’t help it?” He took a deep breath, calming himself. “Mingyu,” his voice was softer now, though it still held a hostile tone. “Did you ever think that Jihoon knew about all your affairs? Did you ever notice how he was suffering to be with you while clearly knowing you’re not his? Do you know how much pain he felt when he came back and heard you f*cking a random girl?!”

Now, Mingyu was greatly shocked. “How… How do you know all this? Where’s Jihoon hyung?” he asked urgently. Minghao grimaced. “Jun was there when you called me. He told me  _ everything _ about Jihoon hyung’s situation.”

Mingyu immediately averted his attention to the man beside Minghao. “Jun hyung, please tell me where Jihoon is,” he pleaded, desperate for answers. Jun stared at him with pitying eyes. 

However, before Jun could say anything, Minghao violently interrupted the conversation, pushing Mingyu and jabbing a finger on his chest.

“As if you’ll get to know! You don’t deserve to know anything about Jihoon hyung!” “Minghao…” Jun said softly, trying to calm his boyfriend down.

Minghao glared daggers at Mingyu. Then, he sighed and deflated. His previous anger nowhere to be seen. He began walking towards Mingyu’s door, preparing to take his leave. “You know,” he said. “I’m not that close to Jihoon hyung. But I know for sure that he didn’t do anything to deserve whatever you’ve done to him.”

And with that, Minghao walked out of the house, not giving Mingyu any answers.”

“Jun hyung…” Minghao pleaded as the other Chinese man started to follow his boyfriend out.

Jun gave the tall man a pitying look, but he bit his lips. Should he tell Mingyu? Or should he not?

As if detecting his thoughts from a few metres away, Minghao shouted from outside, “Say what you want! Then, come out so we can go the h*ll home.”

Jun looked at him again, as if assessing whether Mingyu was worthy of knowing what happened. Eventually, Jun, being the nice person he was, told Mingyu, “Jihoon went to Europe with Soonyoung. He’s gone. And… I think he’ll tell you sooner or later.”

Without explaining anything else, the tall Chinese man scrambled out of the doors to catch up to his boyfriend.

~

_ He’s gone. _

_ Went to Europe. _

_ With Soonyoung. _

_ Gone. _

Mingyu paled.  _ He left me _ . His hyung left him when he thought he never would. He looked at the ring in his hand, tears filling up his eyes.  _ Why _ ? Didn’t they promise? They promised to be together forever, didn’t they? So why did Jihoon leave him all alone? 

_You know fully well why he left you_, his consciousness told him. _Because you were a jerk. You cheated. You played him._ _It’s your own fault he left_.

He didn’t want to listen to that part of his brain. He didn’t want to believe his hyung wasn’t there for him anymore. 

No.

He can’t possibly accept this. The 1996-line must be joking with him. There was no way Jihoon would leave him. Never.

Suddenly, his phone rang shrilly, bringing him back from his thoughts.

He looked at the caller ID and immediately picked up the call.

‘Jihoonie hyung’ was calling.

~

****   
  


“Hyung! Where are you?” Mingyu asked at once. His hyung was calling him. There was still hope that he would come back. 

… Right?

“Mingyu.” Mingyu’s heart thumped at the soft way Jihoon was saying his name. 

How long has it been since he’d talked to his hyung? How long had he even seen him? He paled once more. 

How did he not notice that he hadn’t even been conversing or interacting with his hyung, his boyfriend, for days?

“Jihoonie hyung,” he responded quietly, after a while of collecting his thoughts. “Where are you?”

“I’m on the plane to Europe.”

He could visualise his hyung’s small, sad smile at the other side of the phone. And…

He nearly dropped his phone in shock. 

So Jun really was telling the truth. This wasn’t a joke. He felt his throat constrict, blocking his airway. This was reality…

“Why?! Hyung, I’m sorry for everything! So, come back. Please…” Mingyu cried out, ignoring the fact that he probably sounded like a clingy girlfriend or a whiny child.

“Shut your mouth.”

Mingyu snapped it shut immediately.

“Listen to me, okay? I’m calling right before the flight so there’s only a few minutes left for me to talk to you.”

Mingyu nodded his head sadly, feeling a slight frustration. His hyung wasn’t going to answer all the questions he had. And he most definitely wasn’t coming back. That’s for sure.

Mingyu heard a sigh.

“Are… Are you okay, hyung?” he asked. “What do you think?” Jihoon replied back with a humourless chuckle. His voice sounded strained and anyone could hear the pain and sorrow in it.

“Hyung, I’m —”

“Stop apologising.”  _ Because they mean nothing. They were only empty promises to not hurt him anymore _ .

“I’m leaving, Mingyu. I left my key and ring at home. For the key, you can just keep it as a spare in case you lose yours. Which you’ll probably do, since you’re an idiot.”

“Hey! I’m not —”

“And for the ring, give it to someone you really love, okay? Or if the person’s not fine with it being your ex-lover’s…”  _ If _ they had even been lovers. “Sell it and buy another one.”

“Hyung! Why…”  _ Why are you doing this? _ Mingyu thought, his heart swelling in anger and frustration, as well as hurt and confusion. His hyung wasn’t making any sense to him right now.

He admit he was wrong, and had hurt the older badly. But for his hyung to leave him, didn’t he know it’d hurt the both of them?

“I’m tired, Mingyu.” Jihoon’s voice snapped him back from his thoughts. “I’m tired of being with someone who doesn’t love me back. I’m tired of trying my best to be your boyfriend. And I’m just freaking tired of loving you. Loving the you who doesn’t love me back.”

“I —” “Don’t even try protesting it. How long do you think I’ve known you? You never loved me. That’s why, I’m going.” 

“That doesn’t make any sense!”

“It does.” “As if —”

“I’m setting you free, Mingyu. I’m sorry I tied you down in the first place. So now, you can play around with girls as much as you want. Bring them back home and have sexual intercourse with them. It won’t matter anymore. You won’t have to feel guilty anymore. That’s why I’m going. It’s my repayment for forcing myself on you.”

_ Forcing himself on me? _ Mingyu opened his mouth.  _ No _ .  _ You didn’t force yourself on me. I accepted you. I loved you. Didn’t I? I still love you. _

_ Then, why did you cheat? _ His inner consciousness taunted him.

There wasn’t an answer he could think of.

“Goodbye, Mingyu. Be… Be happy.” Jihoon’s voice cracked at the last part. “Wait, hyung!”

But Jihoon had already hung up on him, leaving him alone in their dark home.

~

“Get ready for take-off.” The pilot announced.

Jihoon held his phone in his hand, gazing outside the plane window and a tear slid down his cheek.

_ It’s over _ . He felt his heart clench in pain. It was screaming at him for leaving the person he loves behind. But… It’s over. Mingyu is free. And he would soon be free as well.

Free from this one-sided love.

He felt Soonyoung tap his shoulder and turned to see his friend’s sad face, eyes shining with understanding.

“Here, Jihoonie,” he said, nudging his friend with his shoulder. “My shoulder’s here for you if you want to cry on it.”

Jihoon couldn’t stop the tears that were flowing down his face and the sobs that were coming out of his mouth.

_ Goodbye, Minggu. I love you. Be happy. _

**Author's Note:**

> And that's it...  
I really hope you all enjoyed it?? >.<


End file.
